Life Before Computers

[Sockratease]

Blatantly stolen from another (vanilla) forum:


Life Before Computers...

An application was for employment
A program was a TV show
A cursor used profanity
A keyboard was a piano!

Memory was something that you lost with age
A CD was a bank account
And if you had a 3 1/2 inch floppy
You hoped nobody found out!

Compress was something you did to garbage
Not something you did to a file
And if you unzipped anything in public
You'd be in jail for awhile!

Log on was adding wood to a fire
Hard drive was a long trip on the road
A mouse pad was where a mouse lived
And a backup happened to your commode!

Cut - you did with a pocket knife
Paste you did with glue
A web was a spider's home
And a virus was the flu!

I guess I'll stick to my pad and paper
And the memory in my head
I hear nobody's been killed in a computer crash
But when it happens they wish they were dead!

[gumbie_goodhead]

Sweet memories, but someone remind me, What did we swear at before we all got computers?

[Link]

We sweared at having to go to school, mostly. And the teachers waiting for us.

And the idiot guys who were banging the girls we wanted to bang.

And the girls we wanted to bang, but wouldn't let us.

And I used to swear at Major Nelson for never having the balls to bang Jeanie.

And Gilligan for not tagging both Mary Ann and Ginger. And Mrs. Howell on the sly.

[beanguy]

A threesome with Jeannie and her sister, or was that on Bewitched?

[Link]

I think that was bewitched. I don't remember Jeanie having a sister.

[gumbie_goodhead]

But she did have an evil cousin or something. I would have been happy to do them all, even Mrs. Howell!

[beanguy]

What chance did any of us have? She was fucking Mr. Magoo!

[Sockratease]

Gilligan's Island was a Metaphor for Hell!

Nobody on the island wants to be there, yet none are able to leave. Each one of the characters represents one of the 7 deadly sins:

Ginger represents LUST - she wears skimpy outfits, is obsessed with her looks, and is a borderline nymphomaniac.

Mary Ann represents ENVY - she is jealous of Ginger's beauty.

The Professor represents PRIDE - he is an annoying know-it-all.

Mr. Howell represents GREED - no explanation needed.

Mrs. Howell represents SLOTH - she has never lifted a finger to help on any of their escape plans.

The Skipper represents two sins: GLUTTONY - no explanation needed; and ANGER - he violently hits Gilligan on each show.

This leaves Gilligan. Gilligan is the person who put them there. He prevents them from leaving by foiling all of their escape plots. Also, it is HIS Island.

Therefore, Gilligan is SATAN.

Crazy? He does wear red in every episode.

Hey elie... Back me up here!

[beanguy]

Sock:
That is a disturbing description, I like it. Ginger wore TIGHT stuff, Mary Anne was the one showing all the skin. The budget must have been too tight to work in another character so the Skipper had 2 of the 7DS's.
Somehow Bewitched and Jeannie had an agenda, but nothing as Faustian. Men attempting to control these extraordinarily powerful, beautiful, sexy women-as if either clod stood a chance in Gilligan's Island.

[Sockratease]

Thanks. I wish it was original!

It's been on my computer (and all over the web too in many variations) for years.

I didn't credit it because I don't know where it came from. But I would not want folks thinking I plagiarized it.

[Jaguar]

OH I remeber that.

[bitch_p0p]

Did Al Gore really invent the internet ?